There are two barriers to forgiveness. One is simple unwillingness, which is something each of us can decide to change. The other is misunderstanding of what biblical forgiveness is. Forgiveness can be confusing. Misinterpretations of Scripture and other misconceptions have distorted its meaning. As we sharpen the focus on God’s view of forgiveness, note which issues have been misconceptions for you and which are issues of unwillingness.
Please Note:
FORGIVENESS IS NOT: dismissing the offender’s moral responsibility.
But FORGIVENESS IS: dismissing the right to pay back and assuming the responsibility to love.
FORGIVENESS IS NOT: primarily a feeling.
But FORGIVENESS IS: primarily a choice based on truth.
FORGIVENESS IS NOT: forgetting the offense.
But FORGIVENESS IS: deciding not to use the offense in retributive ways.
FORGIVENESS IS NOT: a once-for-all event.
Yet FORGIVENESS IS: a decision which often must be reaffirmed.
FORGIVENESS IS NOT: agreeing to trust an untrustworthy person.
But FORGIVENESS IS: being willing (when appropriate) to allow the offender to rebuild responsible trust.
FORGIVENESS IS NOT: passively tolerating future abuse.
Yet FORGIVENESS IS: exercising disciplinary measures with redemptive intent.
The Bible says in Hebrews 12, “Make every effort to live in peace with all men(which would include your spouse) and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.”
